• Alessandra Toscanelli

No one does your life better than YOU!!!!

I've been struggling with a few personal things lately - I thought maybe writing them down and putting them out in the universe will help heal some emotional wounds and maybe help others who may be struggling too.


I've learned a lot over the past few years... Especially this year - some good things, some not so good things. I'm sharing them all - the good and the bad. Because that’s what life is... A series of good and bad events strung together to create a beautiful story of hope, adversity, triumph, and love.


Here are some harsh yet lovely truths - I hope you’ll find peace in the life lessons and gain wisdom from my experiences...


No matter how good you are to some people, they will turn their backs on you. Don't take it personally. Just keep being good to people and maybe learn to guard your heart a bit.

You're the villain in someone's story. And that's okay - everyone has their truth. Stick to yours and don't try to defend yourself - Actions speak much louder than words ever will.


No matter how nice your pictures are, or how important the things you post are - some people just won't hit the like button.... Because it's you. And the first thing people do when they are feeling a certain way about you, is stop liking anything you post. Post anyway. Share your pictures. And, your real stories. They put a smile on someone's face.


Not everyone has the same heart as you. (This one I still struggle with on a daily basis.) Just because you will do it for them, doesn't mean they will do it for you. And, it's unfair for both of you to expect that.


You will be excluded. And, it will hurt. A lot. You'll never understand why. You will remember the pain of being left out, and you will make sure to include everyone so no one has to feel the way that you did.


Your kids (or future kids) will be excluded.

And trust me, that hurts even more.

It’s a great teachable opportunity.


When you put good out into the world, good comes back. Call it karma, or whatever you want... I know it's true. If you are kind, kindness will flood your doorsteps.

You can't be liked by everyone. No matter how hard you try, some people just won't like you. Sometimes it's from personal experience, sometimes it's from what others have told them. Once you accept that, life gets a lot easier.


Friends (and lovers) come and go, unfortunately. It's life. Sometimes friendships you thought would last forever, end abruptly and you're left wondering why. Stop wondering. You're never going to feel satisfied with any answer they give you. Own your part in it, learn from it, and then close that door. That chapter has ended. Allow a new one to begin!!!!


A simple text just to see how someone is doing can mean the world. Just to know someone is thinking about you and cares often turns someone’s whole day around.

Send the text. Always!!!!


No one owes you anything. Especially your parents. Really. Grow up - they did.


Forgive even if you don't get an apology. You can't begin to heal while you're still holding on to the hurt. Let it hurt for a moment. Forgive, and let it go.


You're going to be too much for some people. Too loud. Too opinionated. Too talkative. Those people will never get you. Find the ones who do and love them hard!!!!


People are going to talk about you. Give them good material.


Extend grace to those who need it. We all struggle sometimes.


Life is tough. It's messy. And it's down right ugly at times. It’s also so beautiful. And exciting. Filled with love. And full of adventure. Chase them all!!!!!!!


Be a light. Don't let anyone dull your shine. You never know who may be looking to you for a little bit of sunshine, hope, or joy. Be sunshine. Be hope. Be that joy.


Go outside.


Go on a hike.


Swim in the ocean.


Try a new restaurant.


Go somewhere you've never been.


Look at the stars.


Take oodles of pictures.


Watch the sunsets.


Take that trip.


Buy the shoes.


Eat the cake, donuts, and the tacos!!!!


Most importantly, learn to love yourself. And forgive yourself for not being perfect.


Perfect is boring... And you weren’t meant to be boring...


Live your Aloha!!!!


Xoxoxo ~ Me


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